A Father's Blessing

First I want to welcome you to this site. As Tony said, we hope you find this site a place where you can discuss issues that are on your mind either as a result of the studies we will do, or just things that Dad's need to discuss with other father's. Please use the "comments section" to tell others your thoughts or ask questions. If you would like privacy, please feel free to use either my email address at the top of the site or Tony's email address.

I finished the first reading while on a plane to Las Vegas for work, and have read it a couple of times since then. Several things struck me, but none more than the study done by Dr. Paul Vitz who studied the lives of more than a dozen of the most influential atheists, and learned that the ONE thing they had in common was a defective relationship with thier father. WOW, the power of a fathers blessing (or lack of a father's blessing) can have long lasting and far reaching affects!

I remember like it was yesterday, I was in the 9th grade and had started in a new school. I came home from school and wanted to be "cool" in front of some kids I desperately wanted to become accepted by. So I jumped on my motorcycle and took off up the street, only to get stopped by a policeman less than 100 yards from my house. After a rather embarrasing lecture in front of the other kids walking home from school, the officer told me to go home and tell my parents that he would be by later to talk to them. I, of course, being scared to death went home and waited for my dad to come home from work, and told him what had happened and that he should expect a visitor any minute. My dad never lost his temper, didnt yell, didnt ground me, he simply said "well, when the policeman gets here, you will get yourself out of this the same way you got yourself into it and face whatever the consequences are. I want you to know that I will be with you all the way, and if your are in the right I will back you 100 %, if you are in the wrong I will back you 100% but you will still face the consequences of your actions"

Well, the policeman never showed up and I had admitted to something that I could have kept to myself. But I would'nt have traded the time with my Father for anything. From that day on, I knew that no matter where I found myself, no matter what I had done, no matter who was after me, know matter what decisions I had made or was contemplating....My Father would always be there for me and would never leave me on my own. At the same time I knew that he would not keep me from learning lessons that were needed to be learned because of MY actions. There was a lot of comfort in that. And from that time on, till he passed away in my late 30's he held to that promise. It was'nt just empty words, but a promise that he kept to me in his actions.

I want to end this post by listing the the 5 major elements of a Fathers Blessing as discussed by Gary Smalley and John Trent from the book "The Blessing"
1. Meaningful Touch - Dad's dont be afraid to hug and kiss your children.
2. A Spoken Message - Dads tell your kids that you pray for them and want the best for them.
3. Ataching High Value - Dads give value to the lives your kids have and will lead.
4. Picturing a Special Future - Dads let your kids know that God will use them for mighty things.
5. An Active Commitment - Dads use your time and energy to stay active in your kids lives.

We need to understand and hold to our hearts the awesome impact and influence we can have over our children's lives. A father's blessing can create in a child a desire to have a personal relationship with our God and know that they are loved, respected and have talents that can take them through life. On the other hand the lack of a father's blessing can have long lasting detrimental affects on a child that many times cannot be undone.